Early dating rules for women
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This control is attractive at first, but soon becomes controlling or abusive” says Desloover.
In most cases, individuals who can’t refrain from having a relationship in the first year of recovery are missing an opportunity to address the core issues underlying their addictions.
“If they start dating too soon, they are likely to choose someone who is emotionally less mature, as they themselves are, than if they waited a year.” People tend to choose partners who are at their same emotional maturity level.
It would follow then, that recovering individuals would choose differently after working on themselves first.
Recovering people often have learned to either shut down and hold in their emotions for fear of being hurt or to romanticize their relationships and fall in love at the first opportunity, without discriminating.
“In treatment, people learn new skills that need to be practiced before they are able to make them part of their daily life without returning to old patterns,” she explains.